Now, and back then - a tale of rejection and a tale of revenge. With SPEED METAL.

[la_belle_laide]

As much as I try not to, I very much believe in signs. And I sometimes like to play "radio oracle" or even "iPod oracle." You know, you ask a question, and then put the radio on scan or the iPod on shuffle, and whatever song comes on (or with the radio, whatever words you hear,) that's like a clue. I used to play this all the time with my friend in college. Our only rule was that country music didn't count, LOL.

So the other night my iPod ran down and I was listening to the radio in the car, playing Radio Oracle. I thought, "That guy I really like, Chocolate. I texted him on his birthday and did not hear back from him. What's the story? Should I walk away?" And then stopped scanning.

The station stopped on a talk radio show, with a lady saying the following: "Honey, I don't care if he's busy, or shy, or whatever. If you have called him more than once, and he hasn't returned your calls, then walk away. Sounds like you've already been hurt enough; why let someone else hurt you again? You tried, now it's time to move on."

So I thought, "Well, fair enough. But let's give it one more try." So I tried Chocolate's number again tonight. And received a message that his number has been changed or that his phone is out of service.

Yeah, so, walking away. And kind of mad. Don't "darlin" me and lead me on for three months and then disappear and change your number. That sucks. Usually I don't care, but I liked this guy, and you guys all know that I rarely go on dates with people. When I do, it's 'cause I want to.

Please, no angry rants or name-calling in comments. I'm sure he's got a reason and I'm not looking for people to say rude things about him to make me feel better. I like the dude. Just venting. And, no, it's not because he's attractive or has long hair. *insert massive eye-roll*

I'm mostly pissed that this ruined one of my favorite Bonnie Pink songs. Bleh. ;D

Besides, my friends are all so fantastic to me and we're all going on a daytrip next week. I'd love for Chrysanthemum to be there, but as of right now it looks like just me and two dudefriends I highly value and enjoy. We're going to go and have a great time and laugh all day.

Anyway, but enough of that. I have to get up at a ridiculous hour tomorrow for my super-long day and there are two things I've been wanting to post for a few days now. One is Bruce Lee's screen test:

I knew homeboy was lightning fast, but I never actually knew that he was such a scholar. But anyway, check it out at around 1:00 when he starts to talk about the difference between karate and Kung Fu. And at 1:50 he's talking about comparing Kung Fu to water. We talk about that a lot in KF. Makes so much sense! It's worth it to watch the whole thing, because it's awesome, and parts of it are really cute too.

The other thing I've been meaning to post for a while is apropos nothing, uhh, as usual. Lately I've been sort of revisiting my late childhood/early adulthood and the music I loved during it. Specifically when I was between 19 and 20 or so. I mentioned Iron Maiden a few posts back. Well, a few nights ago, someone or something reminded me of how much I loved Megadeth in my teens. I mean like, obsessively adored, as in, listening to their one album over and over pretty much until my ears bled. That one was "So Far, So Good...So What." I fell in love with Dave Mustaine's snarky vocals, his vitriolic rants, his intellectual rage and of course, the fact that no one could shred like he could. The long, red hair didn't hurt, either. (He's still quite burningly hot, in fact.)

Back in high school, Dave Mustaine was one of "My Husbands." (You know, I still joke around like that today, having a harem of husbands.) But my real high school love was a guy named Kris. He was around 6' with sandy brown hair and hazel eyes. We liked the same kind of music. He wore nerd glasses, but had edge; he was hardcore. Anyway, that year my best friend was a gal named Tina. I told her everything. She knew I had it bad for Kris and she said she was going to help me get him. We went away to Florida the week before school started up again. Before we left for vacation (which my family paid for,) she had somehow managed to procure Kris's home address.

Tina spent the vacation writing letters to Kris telling him that I didn't like him, and not only that, but I was hooking up with all different boys in Florida (I was sixteen,) and was of no use to him etc. I, of course, didn't know she was saying those things. When we got home, I didn't hear from her.

(I know this is tangential – please hold for the Megadeth tie-in.)

I didn't actually see her again until the first day of school. I hated school, but I had something to look forward to. Obviously I was going to see Kris! Probably at lunch, when we'd go hang out behind the store and break the glass bottles left by winos in the alley. The girl who sat in front of me, Margie, turned around to say hi and we started chatting. She asked why I was so happy and I told her it was because I would get to hang out with Kris after not having seen him in so long."

"Kris?" she said. "You mean Tina's boyfriend? That guy you used to hang around with?"

I know it's a long time ago and you might be thinking, "Gosh, she can't remember the exact words like that." But 1) I do remember exact words; I remember exact words from over 20 years ago because that's how my brain works and 2) You know that feeling? You never forget it. And I know exactly what I said back to her, which was nothing. That high school heartbreak, you know! It leaves you speechless, LOL! No LJ back then. ;D

Later in the day I ended up walking behind Tina in the hallway and she didn't know I was there. I heard her laugh and say, "Oh my gawd, when Jules finds out she's gonna..."

I grabbed her by the arm and said, "Going to what?"

I literally watched the color drain from her face, and then she ran away like a coward.

In high school, I was generally an unhappy person. I did mean things to people who had hurt me. And because there were many people who had, I had to be crafty sometimes.

So what I did this time was to take all of the notes she had written me over the years, in which she had talked smack about just about everyone. I wasn't the only person she had done this to. She was a bitch to everyone. I took all those notes and I photocopied them. It costs me lots of money because photocopies were ten cents each back then. I took the copies of her notes and I taped them up everywhere. In the bathrooms. On the bleachers. On the lockers of the people she had written about. In the halls, tucked away in library books, (quite stupid, since hardly anyone ever checked them out,) in the cafeteria, in the gym.

And along with the notes, I printed and copied, with her name at the top, the words to Megadeth's song, "Liar." (I clearly remember that I left out the lines about "your sister" and "your brother." Her sister and brother were just kids and had nothing to do with anything.)

It's easy to laugh at this song now because it's so overwrought that it's almost camp. You can hardly tell when Dave Mustaine is being serious and when he's just being a snarky bastard. And sometimes both. The whole song is actually terribly brilliant when you break it down. The way he rolls the "R" of "sewer rat." His over-the-top, hateful speed-wrath rant, while semi-hilarious, is fantastic to this day. I still know every single word! I should; I listened to it often enough back then. But it's at 3:00, the nearly inarticulate rage, that I loved the best.

Ah, Tina. She had to leave the school and go to a different one. The last I heard of her, she had crawled out of a bathroom window after having been cornered by a group of people who were out for blood. It was not a nice high school, my alma mater. Not a mellow, cheerful place at all.

My other favorites on that album were "In My Darkest Hour" and "Mary Jane":

Revisiting these, I'm once again appreciative of their weird beauty.

I wonder what I'll rediscover next? Maybe it'll be David Bowie (actually, I still have a handful of his songs on my iPod) or T Rex (I have every single CD. Every. Last. One. I should upload those.)

Well well well, that's tonight.

Next week is going to be a wonderful week. I can feel it. Everything is going to go right-side up, for sure!

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Dang, you are hard core, I would mostly just run from bitches in high school. And my favorite Bowie song is Life on Mars.

[ilanlerman.wordpress.com (from livejournal.com)]

That Megadeth album had the most apocalytic guitar sound I ever heard. Still gives me shivers. You are fuelling a serious 80's metal revisit for me! Next up, Operation Mindcrime by Queensryche - mindblowing concept album with incredible twin guitar riffing. 'So that's what it was like to be 17....'

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Oh my god, MINDCRIME. My friends and I used to get together and stage it like an opera. Love Queensryche. =:)