Sessha wa geboku

[la_belle_laide]

I don't have anything specific today, as the, what, fifth, sixth blizzard smothers the tri-state? And I skipped classes last night because it was supposed to start then. Called my professors and begged off a mid-term because I didn't want to get caught on the LIE for 3 hours coming home in a damn ice storm. Dr. R kindly allowed that he would postpone the mid-term until next week.

I stayed home and wrote all day. Wrote and critiqued on SFF and racked up lots of submission points (you have to critique to get points, and four points gets you another submission.) I felt (and I know I use this word a lot,) inspired, really fired up. Once a month in a while I get like this, in a rage to create something incredible. Do I? Probably not, but I spend a lot of time and effort trying. I want to create something that lasts, I guess. Characters that people can talk about, can make their own. Like I do with fandom.

Last night I stayed awake for a long time looking for good Kenshin porn okay, yeah, looking for good Kenshin porn, and you know what, it exists. I was surprised. I've so often bemoaned the fact that there is no such thing as good Cloud Strife porn, at least written, (there was good art: hello CZ!) and yeah, aside from one really sad story, (Vincent Comes Home,) there kind of isn't, not that I've seen. It's all chick-lit, the Kenshin stuff, all WAFF and romance, but some of those writers had talent, at least.

I say "had" because there isn't much of a Kenshin fandom anymore, and the best part of it died with Hakubaikou. A Big Name Fan in RK fandom if there ever was one; rarely have I seen a better artist on the 'net. Min, of course, Hwei, CZ, and certainly on DA there are tons of incredible artists, but Hakubaikou did RK fanart, and I've hardly ever seen that around.

I actually didn't know she died until a few days ago. Distressingly, she could write circles around me, too. In fact, I can't put her "Against A Sea of Troubles" fic down today (except to write, myself.) A repentant Battousai fic, right after the bakumatsu, you never see those. Or at least, you never see them done this well. It's really beautiful. How maddening. How disheartening. And, believe me, I get sudden loss. But this one sticks with me. Hakubaikou, and her unfinished story. What did she mean to say?

You know, I used to be a BNF too, in the LOZ fandom. Maybe a teensy bit in FFVII with the rambling, badly-formatted, completely self-indulgent "Cities Of Poison" but probably a tad bit more with the one-shot Tent. That one earned me the best peer-review I've ever gotten, and my most treasured one to date. It's not that fantastic of a story, I mean in terms of the technical stuff, but I got Cloud right in that one. (And I made one, brief, wanna-be humorous parody Kenshin piece, O Kenshin! My Kenshin! that no one paid much mind to, and rightly so. But personally I still amuse myself.) Nope, my fandom-name is forever and always attached to the Hero Series, and I'm grateful for that. Because I really, really did love writing it. It taught me so much etc. yadda yadda dicker blah. More than anything, it was so damn much fun. I love that people still hold on to those stories. I love that they still want to read them. I'm pretty much embarrassed by them now because technically they were so effing badly written, but I had such a blast writing them. Yeah, it was fly.

And there was the somewhat ill-fated, but still mad funtacular Aku Soku Zan Syndicate, also fairly well-known through a handful of fandoms. LOZ most particularly, but it crossed over into X Files and Kenshin fandom. You know, the punchline is that I think even after all of the monumental hints, even after years, no one outside of a tiny fandom circle of friends knew who Aku Soku Zan Syndicate was. Which maybe is kind of mean. The fangirls came out frothing over it, crazy-defensive, and everyone else practically wet themselves laughing. Most of those links and side-fics are gone now, yanked after FF.net's cataclysmic parody-fic-yank after butthurt fangirls complained enough. Aku Soku Zan was spared, though. Why, I don't know. Only 46 reviews remain on that one. Gosh, all of those pages out there, calling out "The Syndicate" for a silly satire. After all, how could so many people not have known that I was Umeshu-girl and that Lisa S. was Beer Dudess? That "the artist" was Min? That the man in the black coat was Sahrek? I love that we created that mystique. I love that so few people knew it was us. And I hate that Lisa S disappeared. Which is why I put an APB out on the Aku Soku Zan Syndicate page and changed the email address to my own. Further, I was amazed that I remembered the password. It was never one of my own. It was Lisa's. Maybe I'm not amazed. I remember a lot.

Last night I couldn't sleep (badass loner kitsune seeks ginger dragon that she cannot curb-stomp, multiple-personality required, must like packs of wild dogs, and other such madwhackery,) and I stayed awake remembering each of my fandoms from the time I was twelve until now. I could go in order from 1985. Duran Duran. Heart. Bon Jovi. Stephen King. Hamlet (seriously.) David Bowie. Pink Floyd. Nirvana. Mystery Science Theater (seriously.) Pearl Jam. Alice In Chains (for the next few years, interspersed with Soundgarden and NIN.) Then came 1999, my Japanese advent. LOZ in '99. Gundam Wing. Final Fantasy VII. Rurouni Kenshin. X Files. The Dark Tower. Pirates of the Caribbean. 30 Seconds To Mars. Sei Shonagon. Resident Evil4. I don't really remember what I liked in '09. And this year, I replayed, re-read, re-lived everything from the past ten years. Probably because of the way '09 went, losing so much that year. Maybe that's why I keep looking backwards in the mirror at the little things that I held on to. My car, the roaring green dinosaur, Shinigami-sama. I still brush the snow off of it, just out of respect. And trying to get back in touch with Min, and trying to locate Lisa S.

Actually, I really don't know what became of Lisa S. She completely disappeared. Not a word to me, or to anyone that I know of. Poof, gone. And the ridiculously premature loss of Hakubaikou made me have to go looking for her. Or, maybe not since I started wondering what had become of her even a few days ago. Hmm, so don't listen to me; I don't know what I'm talking about.

In general, I don't know what I'm talking about. ^_^;;

So, and the snow keeps falling, and I'm just about this close to punching winter in the throat. School is closed today, of course, on my day off. And it had better not be closed tomorrow (oh please let school be closed tomorrow) because it's Intro to Clinic and that would be a bitch to make up, down the road. I'd have to miss yet another day of work and I can't afford that. (But, still?)

Ano, now I've babbled enough for today. Stay warm, east coast!

Comments

[torkell]

Ah... that fic. The one which has me laughing non-stop every time I read it.

I'd eventually spotted the Sahrek reference and worked out who Shiek and at least one Link was, although I was never quite sure about the other Link. Min... the name sounds familiar, but I've no idea where from (unless she's Min from the Wheel of Time series, but that makes no sense).

As to the authors, well with the references in it I'd guessed that you had some part in it, but I never guessed who the other author was. I remember doing a bit of googling once in the search of more fics by the "Aku Soku Zan Syndicate" (at the time I found it, only the LoZ fic was left), but never found anything.

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's the one! Oh, the LOZFFML, how much fun were those times? The other Link was from Lisa's fics. Battleflag, her biggest one.

Min, the artist, THE LOZ artist. The BNF LOZ artist. One Mina Rho. ^_^ I miss her.

Oh, Lisa-dono and I only wrote that one fic together. Actually, you know, I tell a lie. We wrote fics for each other's fics, once. I never posted mine, but it was about (her) Dark Link and Kafei from Majora's Mask. I might have that sucker somewhere, or maybe it's online somewhere. It was called "Dark." It might be hanging around the LOZFFML to this day.

Actually, Lisa and I wrote that at my house one night, drunk off our ass. If that tells you anything. ;D

Good times. I do very much wonder what became of her.

The long-kept secret is out, and one person still cares. ^_^ And, I'm always so pleased that you remember. :)

[(Anonymous)]

"Sessha wa geboku"


I googled that, and only this page came up. ???

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry to but in but I think it means something like 'this unworthy one is your humble servant' Right?

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Yes, along those lines. :)

[lauraceleste.livejournal.com]

I remember Lisa, and Min, and the whole LOZFFML. Those were lovely times.

Http://lozffml.dreamhost.com i think?

If you ever find out about Lisa, let us know...

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Yeah! Those really were fun times. :) I absolutely will update on Lisa. Actually, I was going to ask you if you'd heard anything from her over the years. But, I guess not. :)