Just, whatever. ;D

[la_belle_laide]

Yeah, so I sent the query out last night to my top choice of agents because she seems superfly cool, and on waking this morning I re-read the query--which I re-wrote on the fly right before midnight last night--and face-palmed. It could have been so much better.

I'm re-writing it again (what is this, now, the 20th time? Something like that,) to send to a different agent. Because with agents, unlike editors of publishing companies, you're supposed to cast a wide net. They expect you to simultaneously submit your query to lots of different agents.

The biggest problem I'm running into (aside from my own awkwardness) is that so few agents want to represent sci-fi. It's amazing, I went through this book that had hundreds of agents, literally hundreds, with all kinds of info on what they like, what they hate, pet peeves, pet projects, you name it. And I found TEN that actively seen sci-fi. Most of the rest specifically point out that they want nothing to do with it. They're like, “Send me anything, seriously. Send me romance, comedy, young adult, horror, sparkling vampires, killer monkeys, toenail clippings, ransom notes, porn about my mom, but do NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT SENDING SCI-FI.”

Hmm. It's time to bring sci-fi back. Why does everyone hate it? It's obviously a konspirassy against me.

I guess the thing to do today is just ignore Xmas. I always get really into the damn holidays; I'm one of those ridiculously cheerful idiots who loves the songs, the lights, the prezzies and all that secular stuff. I love the weather, the solstice, the tree, the food.

But, how do you do it on a year like this one, after losing first Gran and then Dad? It's impossible. I wish the whole thing had been canceled this year, selfishly, so that other people couldn't be talking about how much fun they're having with their happy families.

I know how wrong that is. I'm often wrong and selfish! ;)

My brother called today from work and he was also really dreary. He's lucky he gets to work today. I have to work tomorrow, when it's going to be dead and the people who do come in are going to be grouchy, but I wish it were today.

Like I mentioned previously, I went out with a group of gals a few days ago who had also lost their Dads at a young age, and I have three friends who lost their Dads at a young age just as suddenly as I lost mine, completely without any warning. I get lots of advice from all of them and it all makes sense, though some is hard to implement. At least while it's still the first year, I guess. I think it takes a long time to fit into this suit.

“It's a sucky club to be in,” one of my friends told me.

Lao Shir, who not only lost her Dad but went through so much else on top of it, said that she keeps a little journal wherein every night, she writes down three things that made her happy that day. They don't have to be big things—it could be “I had the best cup of tea today”--but find three things every day, no matter what.

I'm fortunate in that this is easy for me. I'm a simple creature, and even while I'm stuck feeling depressed and missing Dad and Gran, it's still easy for me to enjoy little things like that. I know I can be cynical and snarky but essentially I'm an optimist. I'm not freezing, starving, fighting a war, without shelter, or many of the other crises that so many people look in the face every day. So this affords me the privilege (the obligation,) to appreciate these things.

So here's today's list:

I put down the epic King novel I was enjoying and am reading a frivolous but really well-done novelization of Resident Evil 2. Good pacing, great characterization of my favorite character, and tons of swearing, violence, zombies, and gore. Yay.

I make the best oatmeal in the world.

I actually really do love to write. It's not a chore. It makes me happy.

The new 30STM album is awesome and I have three favorite songs that I'm at that stage where I can play them over and over and hear something new each time.

My floors are nice and clean.

I bought the dogs these awesome coats, since Sano's lost most of his fur and Haku's taken to frolicking in the snow and then trying to warm himself by the heater for the rest of the day. I went into my favorite pet store the other day and asked if, by any slim chance, did they have two extra large heavy coats with velcro? And they stared at me with their jaws on the floor because they were just unpacking two extra large heavy coats with velcro. They think I'm a nice customer so they sold them to me at a discount. ^_^

And I also have a comfy sweater, which is the best sweater in the world and seriously, everyone is so jealous when they see my cozy sweater, even strangers.

Lemme get some pics up of the dogs in their coats and me in the best sweater ever.











So, it's not peachy-keen or anything, but, you know, it's today and there are still some pretty cool things to see, hear, taste, and all that other qualia stuff.

Comments

[skitty-kitty.livejournal.com]

Is this RE2 novelization a fan one that you could possibly link me to? :D

The dog coats look really cute, and good luck netting an agent! It is kind of sad and interesting how much scifi has a bad rap. I think IIRC Atwood, who's a big writer that is scifi whether she wants to cop to it or not, gets upset if she's classified as scifi. Too bad people can't stop looking at the labels and see whether or not something is good based on the story.

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Hells no, it's an actual official novel, you can get it on Amazon! It's called City Of The Dead I think. Something like that, I hardly looked at the cover. ;)

You're right about genres, though I still wonder why people are so negative about sci-fi. It needs to have a massive resurgence.

[spotts1701.livejournal.com]

It's amazing how sci-fi in the print world is treated so much like animation is in television. "It's cute, but it's not for the serious artisans of the craft."

Hey, it's okay to be selfish once in a while. You do so much for others that every once in a while you can say "This is me time." Even if it is Christmas.

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

Thanks very, very much. :)

Too right about sci-fi, and it's a shame. There's such brilliant stuff out there. And I totally cop to thinking steampunk is the shizz. That's my thing, steampunk.

People need to read some Gibson if they think sci-fi is not serious. ^_^

[spotts1701.livejournal.com]

Even the series-based soft sci-fi (like Star Trek and Star Wars) is getting away from the "Status Quo is God" complex and actually going for some real universe-shattering events (like the Destiny Trilogy and the upcoming Typhon Pact, which has completely remade the Trek universe into something that would have been impossible to do on a weekly series budget).

[malenka-zeut.livejournal.com]

I guess I didn't realize that about sci-fi since just about everyone I know who reads loves it. That seems so crazy & wrong. Plus, steampunk has an instant audience at the moment. Or so it seems. The dog coats are so cute! I love them. I'm glad they are enjoying the snow, and I love those moments when you walk in and get exactly what you went for like that. Too cool. And yes, I have total sweater envy! BTW, my mom says you look great and you always did. (I showed her your snow pics) Spots1701 is right, you do so much for others that you shouldn't think twice about being selfish sometimes.

[la-belle-laide.livejournal.com]

yeah, sci-fi is really in the dumps, at least as far as agent are concerned. There's a list of agents out there that I'm gonna look into, but from my book so far all I got was about ten. I hope to send out another query tonight. :)

Tell your Mom thanks and I miss her! Thank you, too. :)