chaos, dogfights, and Hula

Madness, chaos



Here I am in the hotel room, trying to collect my wits. It was enough excitement to have seen Smithpoint beach while flying over the Island (and thinking, "I parked in that lot! I went under that tunnel! I surfed") and then having a very rough flight, and then, on the second flight, sitting next to a really cute guy. (One other guy tried to strike up a conversation with me, and he was nice enough, so I was nice to him, too, but I wasn't interested in talking. So when the cute guy sat next me on the plane, and I said something to him and he made a polite reply instead of offering me his hand in marriage, I didn't press the matter. I don't want to be that person.) So, for me, that's a lot of excitement for one day.

Then I get off the plane, collect my luggage and find where I'm supposed to wait for the shuttle. As I'm waiting, I start thinking about home, which is nothing so unusual, as I often think about home when I'm away from it. I always feel guilty about leaving all my dogs at my parents' place, especially now, with the puppy, so I was wondering how that was all going. More specifically, I begin to remember that the neighbors who I really adored are gone since yesterday--Sadie and Shamil, an elderly couple, she from Russia, he from Turkey, both lovely people--and in their place is, from what I could tell last night, a bunch of loud people. I remembered how, when I pulled up yesterday, I made sure to have my windows down and my stereo on loud, which, I know, is such a ridiculous thing to do, but I was mad at them for just having taken the place of these lovely people. It was ridiculous because I hadn't met them yet and already I had decided that I didn't like them. Then I told myself to stop being that way, and give them a chance. Maybe they were lovely people, too.

So anyway, instead of waiting till I got to the hotel, something told me to call home just then, as I was waiting for the shuttle. My Dad picked up the phone and had enough time to greet me before I could hear my Mom screaming in the background. And my Mom never screams. And then my Dad said, "Shit! Hang on!" and was gone. So here's me, freaking out now as the shuttle pulls up, trying to drag my bags up the stairs and going, "DAD! DAD! What's going on?" with everyone looking at me. A few seconds later he gets back on the phone and tells me, "The neighbor's dog jumped the fence and attacked Sano. Hang on." Now, just to be clear, the neighbors don't have a fence, but I do. Sano was in his own fenced in yard, barking at their passing car, when their dog leapt out of their open front window and over my fence.

So of course, now I start freaking right the hell out on the shuttle. I'm saying, "I'll come home, I'll come home! I'll get the next flight!" even though I'm still on hold. Then my Mom gets on the phone, all breathless, saying, "Sano got attacked, your Dad's out there now," and all of this kind of thing. I'm asking, "How bad is it, can he walk, does he need stitches?" and Mom's going, "He's okay, but there's a hole in his leg." So I told her to file a report and take him to the vets, like now, and have them shave the fur around his neck to make sure that there are no holes there, either. Because that's where dogs usually bite first.

Then I was at the hotel, and Mom told me Sano was all right and I should go ahead and check in and go to my classes. As I was checking in, I saw Uncle John and Uncle Jerome Koko in the lounge, and I ran over to greet them. Coming around the corner a minute later was Uncle Moon, who I haven't seen in two years. He looks beautiful with his salt and pepper hair and wire rim glasses, and I just gave him the biggest hug and told them all what had just happened. I said that my brain had just melted and I had to go up to my room and call my Mom back. This I did, and then I started to unpack, only to realize that my laptop was gone. I searched the entire room, but to no avail. In a panic, I ran back down the the lobby, and there it was, propped up on a chair in the lounge. *Sigh!* My brain doesn't just melt, it leaks out of my ear.

Anyway, I got the entire story from Mom. I actually called her as soon as I got to my room, and she was on her way to the vets with Sano. She said that she had seen the neighbor out there trying to call his dog back and she was screaming at him, "Get your dog or I'll kill it, I swear I'll kill it." And she wold have, too, if she could have caught them. Finally the guy got his dog back, and my Dad went out there in a rage as Mom was calling Rob and also making a report to my uncle at Animal Control. (Yeah, I'll bet you this guy is going to be so happy when he finds out that the dog his dangerous animal just attacked out of nowhere is owned by Animal Control's neice.) It started when Sano was barking, as he always does, which drives me crazy. But it's his yard, and he's got the right to bark at passing cars. Their pit bull (and believe me, I'm not breedist; I don't think all pit bulls are bad by any stretch of the imagination--but this one is,) jumped through their window, across the street, and over my fence. My Grandmother was out at the time with her dog Belle, and Dad had just taken Haku inside, and Trisky was still out. Apparently the pit bull and Sano went right at it, although Sano managed to sort of sweep the pit bull away from all the other dogs before the pit bull grabbed him by both his legs. He now has two sets of holes on each front leg. However, while the pit bull was trying to take Sano down, Sano managed to rip chunks out of both of the pit bull's ears. The pit bull needed stitches and is missing some of his ears, and Sano, thank god, is fine, though a little tired, my Mom says, and now on antibiotics. What this means is that Sano was trying to do what he is meant to do as the oldest male dog in the pack: kill the intruder. He didn't kill the other dog, but come on, this border collieXshep mix of mine--this mutt--opened a can of whupass on a pit bull and protected the other dogs in his pack.

I called my Dad again after my class tonight, and he said that he spoke with he neighbors. Apparently they are deeply sorry, and they are willing to pay Sano's vet bill, and, gee, their dog never did anything like this before (sure, which is why Sadie and Shamil's son told my Dad last week that they knew they had to get a six foot fence in their yard because their dog was a fence-jumper,) and, golly, your wife sure was mad! She said she wanted to kill our dog! They said they totally understood all of that and they would have felt the same way.

And, you know, I deal with problem dogs. Sano can be a problem dog--he barks too much and he doesn't like strangers. And, yes, anything can happen, because dogs are unpredictable, and even the best dogs do crazy things sometimes. But something tells me that this isn't the case with them and with their dog. Something tells me that this dog is a status symbol gone out of control. And as far as how I feel about my new neighbors, well, the words "It's on" spring to mind, but again, I know that I'm just being emotional and there's really not much I can do to them. But I will say this: they're not lovely people.

Anyway, now that I got the full story and all my pets are all right, thanks to Sano (and thank god it was Sano, because a pit bull would have easily broken Trisky's delicate legs and maybe bitten her on the neck, and it would have certainly killed Haku in about 30 seconds,) then I could concentrate on why I'm here: Hula.

After spending some time in my hotel room trying to re-combobulate, I went down to register and get dinner. Downstairs I first saw Kamai, and I ran to her with the biggest hug. Beautiful, kind Kamai and beautiful, kind Kumu Kawehi and a bunch of their dancers (including that one guy whom I've actually known for about three years but have never managed to read his nametag, but I sort of crush on him everytime I see him. It takes a real man to shave his head and wear a malo, and he still looks so appealing with his big smile and aqualine nose.) And then Pat came in and we talked for a while, and then I went to look around the vending tables and spent one hundred and twenty dollars in one shot in two incredibly beautiful Kim Taylor Reese resin statues--a wahine Kahiko dance and a breathtaking kane Kahiko dancer. I have no frigging clue how I'm going to get them home.

Then I went for dinner, and I sat at the bar in the lounge because I only wanted something small and cheap to eat, like a quesadia or however the hell it's spelled. The bartender was this big black guy who was working alone and was completely overwhelmed, because it was Friday at 5 PM and there was no one there to help take the orders and serve them. He was nervous and pissed off, and I knew just how he felt. I said to him, "You look a bit overwhelmed," and, looking down at the cash register he muttered, "Damn right I am! Shit! Shit! They always do this to me!" I said, "I know how you feel; that really sucks." He said, "It's going to be a minute before I can get to you," and I told him to take his time. Then he went back to muttering and being exasperated. After he served a few more people he came back to the register which also seemed to be having a problem. He mashed some keys, tried to phone for help, and went back to swearing. Then he muttered to me, "Anyway... so how are you?" I thought about it for a second and then said, "Good! I'm good." He said, "that's good." Then he looked at me and said, "You look good, girl." Which was a nice thing to hear, honestly, because I didn't feel as if I looked anything other than a frazzled mess. He asked if he could get me anything, and I asked for a menu. And then two guys sat down next to me. I took ten seconds to look over the menu, saw the quesadia, decided, and put the menu down. The guy next to me turned to me and said, in a charming Jamaican accent, "That was quick, you decide already?" I told him that I had, and then he started talking to the guy next to him. Bored, I half-heartedly listened in. Apparently the one guy with the Jamaican accent was, well, Jamaican, and the other guy was from Germany. He had a very heavy German accent that reminded me of Kim's, even though hers is hardly noticabe anymore.

After a while, the guy next to me turned to me and said, "We not ignoring you, girl." I laughed and told him it was all right, I was halfway asleep anyway and mostly staring at the TV. He laughed and said, "You order something to eat yet? Maybe it come tonight." I told him I hoped it would. Then he got up and moved to another seat by the bar and said to the German guy, "I'm gonna smoke, and I don't want to smoke near the girl. I a gentleman." Gosh, he was so sweet, and I really love the way he spoke.

Anyway, so finally I got my dinner and I left. After dinner, it was time for Uncle Moon's class. I sat in the front row, getting my notebook ready and all of that. Soon I heard Auntie Kau'i a few rows behind me. Can I ever say enough how much she lights up the entire room? I ran to talk to her, told her the story about Sano which I had already told everyone I had seen today, and babbled a few more things about when I was coming back to Florida and that I would try to be in hers or Kawehi's class again. Then--as I had been asked to do--I told her that my Mom and Dad had sent their Aloha, as well as my Grandma and my cousins. Of course, she laughed and gave me a hug, and then a punch on the arm, which she does everytime she sees me.

Moon's class was part language, mostly chant. I was so pleased with this, because I love chant, and the mele we did has an unusual and sweet melody. But more than that, it was just nice to sit there and listen to him. He's so gentle and knowledgable, never makes people feel stupid for not knowing this or that. We had question and answer afterwards, and talked about meles and Hulas that were still kapu. He mentioned that some 'ilio chants were kapu (dog chants, if you can believe it!) and some Pele chants, but the ones that he was teaching had no restrictions.

After the class, I knew he would be mobbed and I'd never get to talk to him tonight. So I went to say goodnight to Auntie Kau'i, Kamai and Kawehi. I chatted a while with Pat while we wandered back to the vending room (all the while I was so thirsty I thought I would die,) and I ended up buying an 'otea skirt for five dollars. Actually, my friend Stephanie had bought it already, but when she saw me looking at it she told me to take it, because she had already just bought another, bigger 'Otea skirt for twenty, and the headpiece that goes with it. A little FYI: a new 'Otea skirt and headpiece can go for a few hundred dollars. I bought mine four or so years ago for $260. So I gave her the five bucks and she gave me the skirt. I still have no idea how the hell I'm going to get all this stuff home.

Uncle Jerome and Uncle John were there signing autographs, and I went to say goodnight to them as well. On the way back, I chatted with Pat and stopped for a Powerade, which was the best thing I've ever drank in my entire life, because five more minutes without it and my kidneys were going to shrivel up to dust. As I passed y the lounge, I saw the Jamaican guy still sitting there.

And this is my Dancer's Dream weekend so far.

chaos, dogfights, and Hula

Madness, chaos



Here I am in the hotel room, trying to collect my wits. It was enough excitement to have seen Smithpoint beach while flying over the Island (and thinking, "I parked in that lot! I went under that tunnel! I surfed") and then having a very rough flight, and then, on the second flight, sitting next to a really cute guy. (One other guy tried to strike up a conversation with me, and he was nice enough, so I was nice to him, too, but I wasn't interested in talking. So when the cute guy sat next me on the plane, and I said something to him and he made a polite reply instead of offering me his hand in marriage, I didn't press the matter. I don't want to be that person.) So, for me, that's a lot of excitement for one day.

Then I get off the plane, collect my luggage and find where I'm supposed to wait for the shuttle. As I'm waiting, I start thinking about home, which is nothing so unusual, as I often think about home when I'm away from it. I always feel guilty about leaving all my dogs at my parents' place, especially now, with the puppy, so I was wondering how that was all going. More specifically, I begin to remember that the neighbors who I really adored are gone since yesterday--Sadie and Shamil, an elderly couple, she from Russia, he from Turkey, both lovely people--and in their place is, from what I could tell last night, a bunch of loud people. I remembered how, when I pulled up yesterday, I made sure to have my windows down and my stereo on loud, which, I know, is such a ridiculous thing to do, but I was mad at them for just having taken the place of these lovely people. It was ridiculous because I hadn't met them yet and already I had decided that I didn't like them. Then I told myself to stop being that way, and give them a chance. Maybe they were lovely people, too.

So anyway, instead of waiting till I got to the hotel, something told me to call home just then, as I was waiting for the shuttle. My Dad picked up the phone and had enough time to greet me before I could hear my Mom screaming in the background. And my Mom never screams. And then my Dad said, "Shit! Hang on!" and was gone. So here's me, freaking out now as the shuttle pulls up, trying to drag my bags up the stairs and going, "DAD! DAD! What's going on?" with everyone looking at me. A few seconds later he gets back on the phone and tells me, "The neighbor's dog jumped the fence and attacked Sano. Hang on." Now, just to be clear, the neighbors don't have a fence, but I do. Sano was in his own fenced in yard, barking at their passing car, when their dog leapt out of their open front window and over my fence.

So of course, now I start freaking right the hell out on the shuttle. I'm saying, "I'll come home, I'll come home! I'll get the next flight!" even though I'm still on hold. Then my Mom gets on the phone, all breathless, saying, "Sano got attacked, your Dad's out there now," and all of this kind of thing. I'm asking, "How bad is it, can he walk, does he need stitches?" and Mom's going, "He's okay, but there's a hole in his leg." So I told her to file a report and take him to the vets, like now, and have them shave the fur around his neck to make sure that there are no holes there, either. Because that's where dogs usually bite first.

Then I was at the hotel, and Mom told me Sano was all right and I should go ahead and check in and go to my classes. As I was checking in, I saw Uncle John and Uncle Jerome Koko in the lounge, and I ran over to greet them. Coming around the corner a minute later was Uncle Moon, who I haven't seen in two years. He looks beautiful with his salt and pepper hair and wire rim glasses, and I just gave him the biggest hug and told them all what had just happened. I said that my brain had just melted and I had to go up to my room and call my Mom back. This I did, and then I started to unpack, only to realize that my laptop was gone. I searched the entire room, but to no avail. In a panic, I ran back down the the lobby, and there it was, propped up on a chair in the lounge. *Sigh!* My brain doesn't just melt, it leaks out of my ear.

Anyway, I got the entire story from Mom. I actually called her as soon as I got to my room, and she was on her way to the vets with Sano. She said that she had seen the neighbor out there trying to call his dog back and she was screaming at him, "Get your dog or I'll kill it, I swear I'll kill it." And she wold have, too, if she could have caught them. Finally the guy got his dog back, and my Dad went out there in a rage as Mom was calling Rob and also making a report to my uncle at Animal Control. (Yeah, I'll bet you this guy is going to be so happy when he finds out that the dog his dangerous animal just attacked out of nowhere is owned by Animal Control's neice.) It started when Sano was barking, as he always does, which drives me crazy. But it's his yard, and he's got the right to bark at passing cars. Their pit bull (and believe me, I'm not breedist; I don't think all pit bulls are bad by any stretch of the imagination--but this one is,) jumped through their window, across the street, and over my fence. My Grandmother was out at the time with her dog Belle, and Dad had just taken Haku inside, and Trisky was still out. Apparently the pit bull and Sano went right at it, although Sano managed to sort of sweep the pit bull away from all the other dogs before the pit bull grabbed him by both his legs. He now has two sets of holes on each front leg. However, while the pit bull was trying to take Sano down, Sano managed to rip chunks out of both of the pit bull's ears. The pit bull needed stitches and is missing some of his ears, and Sano, thank god, is fine, though a little tired, my Mom says, and now on antibiotics. What this means is that Sano was trying to do what he is meant to do as the oldest male dog in the pack: kill the intruder. He didn't kill the other dog, but come on, this border collieXshep mix of mine--this mutt--opened a can of whupass on a pit bull and protected the other dogs in his pack.

I called my Dad again after my class tonight, and he said that he spoke with he neighbors. Apparently they are deeply sorry, and they are willing to pay Sano's vet bill, and, gee, their dog never did anything like this before (sure, which is why Sadie and Shamil's son told my Dad last week that they knew they had to get a six foot fence in their yard because their dog was a fence-jumper,) and, golly, your wife sure was mad! She said she wanted to kill our dog! They said they totally understood all of that and they would have felt the same way.

And, you know, I deal with problem dogs. Sano can be a problem dog--he barks too much and he doesn't like strangers. And, yes, anything can happen, because dogs are unpredictable, and even the best dogs do crazy things sometimes. But something tells me that this isn't the case with them and with their dog. Something tells me that this dog is a status symbol gone out of control. And as far as how I feel about my new neighbors, well, the words "It's on" spring to mind, but again, I know that I'm just being emotional and there's really not much I can do to them. But I will say this: they're not lovely people.

Anyway, now that I got the full story and all my pets are all right, thanks to Sano (and thank god it was Sano, because a pit bull would have easily broken Trisky's delicate legs and maybe bitten her on the neck, and it would have certainly killed Haku in about 30 seconds,) then I could concentrate on why I'm here: Hula.

After spending some time in my hotel room trying to re-combobulate, I went down to register and get dinner. Downstairs I first saw Kamai, and I ran to her with the biggest hug. Beautiful, kind Kamai and beautiful, kind Kumu Kawehi and a bunch of their dancers (including that one guy whom I've actually known for about three years but have never managed to read his nametag, but I sort of crush on him everytime I see him. It takes a real man to shave his head and wear a malo, and he still looks so appealing with his big smile and aqualine nose.) And then Pat came in and we talked for a while, and then I went to look around the vending tables and spent one hundred and twenty dollars in one shot in two incredibly beautiful Kim Taylor Reese resin statues--a wahine Kahiko dance and a breathtaking kane Kahiko dancer. I have no frigging clue how I'm going to get them home.

Then I went for dinner, and I sat at the bar in the lounge because I only wanted something small and cheap to eat, like a quesadia or however the hell it's spelled. The bartender was this big black guy who was working alone and was completely overwhelmed, because it was Friday at 5 PM and there was no one there to help take the orders and serve them. He was nervous and pissed off, and I knew just how he felt. I said to him, "You look a bit overwhelmed," and, looking down at the cash register he muttered, "Damn right I am! Shit! Shit! They always do this to me!" I said, "I know how you feel; that really sucks." He said, "It's going to be a minute before I can get to you," and I told him to take his time. Then he went back to muttering and being exasperated. After he served a few more people he came back to the register which also seemed to be having a problem. He mashed some keys, tried to phone for help, and went back to swearing. Then he muttered to me, "Anyway... so how are you?" I thought about it for a second and then said, "Good! I'm good." He said, "that's good." Then he looked at me and said, "You look good, girl." Which was a nice thing to hear, honestly, because I didn't feel as if I looked anything other than a frazzled mess. He asked if he could get me anything, and I asked for a menu. And then two guys sat down next to me. I took ten seconds to look over the menu, saw the quesadia, decided, and put the menu down. The guy next to me turned to me and said, in a charming Jamaican accent, "That was quick, you decide already?" I told him that I had, and then he started talking to the guy next to him. Bored, I half-heartedly listened in. Apparently the one guy with the Jamaican accent was, well, Jamaican, and the other guy was from Germany. He had a very heavy German accent that reminded me of Kim's, even though hers is hardly noticabe anymore.

After a while, the guy next to me turned to me and said, "We not ignoring you, girl." I laughed and told him it was all right, I was halfway asleep anyway and mostly staring at the TV. He laughed and said, "You order something to eat yet? Maybe it come tonight." I told him I hoped it would. Then he got up and moved to another seat by the bar and said to the German guy, "I'm gonna smoke, and I don't want to smoke near the girl. I a gentleman." Gosh, he was so sweet, and I really love the way he spoke.

Anyway, so finally I got my dinner and I left. After dinner, it was time for Uncle Moon's class. I sat in the front row, getting my notebook ready and all of that. Soon I heard Auntie Kau'i a few rows behind me. Can I ever say enough how much she lights up the entire room? I ran to talk to her, told her the story about Sano which I had already told everyone I had seen today, and babbled a few more things about when I was coming back to Florida and that I would try to be in hers or Kawehi's class again. Then--as I had been asked to do--I told her that my Mom and Dad had sent their Aloha, as well as my Grandma and my cousins. Of course, she laughed and gave me a hug, and then a punch on the arm, which she does everytime she sees me.

Moon's class was part language, mostly chant. I was so pleased with this, because I love chant, and the mele we did has an unusual and sweet melody. But more than that, it was just nice to sit there and listen to him. He's so gentle and knowledgable, never makes people feel stupid for not knowing this or that. We had question and answer afterwards, and talked about meles and Hulas that were still kapu. He mentioned that some 'ilio chants were kapu (dog chants, if you can believe it!) and some Pele chants, but the ones that he was teaching had no restrictions.

After the class, I knew he would be mobbed and I'd never get to talk to him tonight. So I went to say goodnight to Auntie Kau'i, Kamai and Kawehi. I chatted a while with Pat while we wandered back to the vending room (all the while I was so thirsty I thought I would die,) and I ended up buying an 'otea skirt for five dollars. Actually, my friend Stephanie had bought it already, but when she saw me looking at it she told me to take it, because she had already just bought another, bigger 'Otea skirt for twenty, and the headpiece that goes with it. A little FYI: a new 'Otea skirt and headpiece can go for a few hundred dollars. I bought mine four or so years ago for $260. So I gave her the five bucks and she gave me the skirt. I still have no idea how the hell I'm going to get all this stuff home.

Uncle Jerome and Uncle John were there signing autographs, and I went to say goodnight to them as well. On the way back, I chatted with Pat and stopped for a Powerade, which was the best thing I've ever drank in my entire life, because five more minutes without it and my kidneys were going to shrivel up to dust. As I passed y the lounge, I saw the Jamaican guy still sitting there.

And this is my Dancer's Dream weekend so far.